Thursday, February 25, 2010

Episode 4: The St. Valentine's Day Massacre


"The signifier cannot contain the signified." Oooh, sounds like this Negative Nancy didn't get a rose.
Rugged mascuinity=Abercrombie, hair product, and a nice cabin behind a sand dune. BTdubs, did I mention I'm gay?

There is just, like, so much feeeeeeling going on in this group right now. Gia is in a fairy tale. Tenley desires to form a family. Jesse needs to get her dune buggy out of a rut. Ali and Vienna are on the verge of makin' out in front of everybody. How much longer before Jake proposes an orgy in front of the Grauman's Chinese Theatre? His lips say tradition, decency, and faith; his dong sez "Let me fill more holes than the golf course in Caddyshack." And man, those are hot lips. 

It was a bloodbath, full of tears and angst. The writers have found their footing again. Vienna and Ali is the showdown; everyone else will be butchered. Momma Ella--along with the remaining three who ABC left on the cutting room floor to ensure that no one would care when they got axed--did indeed get axed. But it was really really hard for Jake! He even wept! He is such a good guy. I hope you remember that the next time he tries to pick you up in a singles bar in Westwood.

At the end of the day, don't you really wish that Jake would just suck it up and marry Johnny Weir?

No comments:

Post a Comment